


Tax Season

by shadedScribe



Category: RWBY
Genre: Chatlogs, Gen, Humor, Inspired By Tumblr, Oscar Pine: Tax Wizard, shoutout to tumblr user Luimnigh for the inspiration, the gang does their taxes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:07:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24395506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadedScribe/pseuds/shadedScribe
Summary: It's tax season in Mistral, and some people are better prepared than others.
Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long, Jaune Arc/Pyrrha Nikos
Comments: 3
Kudos: 45





	Tax Season

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Luimnigh](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luimnigh/gifts).



> I was lurking in the RWBY tag on tumblr and saw @luimnigh's post about RWBY characters and taxes, and was Inspired to brush off the old HS workskin and do a little chat fic. This one takes place in a vague post-victory future where the day has been saved and Pyrrha got rezzed somehow and they're all sort of hanging out in Mistral. Enjoy!

  
wintrySiren opened memo on board Favors and Helpful Things  
WS: If it’s not too much of a bother, I could use some help.  
WS: Does anyone here know how to file taxes in Mistral?  
yearningLionheart answered memo  
YL: I can probably figure it out  
YL: I should probably do mine soon anyway so I can just help you out while I’m doing that  
bisexualBookworm answered memo  
BB: If you would prefer, Yang  
BB: I’m still a citizen of Menagerie, and I’d be happy to file jointly with you there.  
BB: Huntresses get more tax breaks back home, and taxes are also just lower in general.  
YL: but it’s still a month until the wedding  
BB: Menagerie’s tax code lets anyone who has “a close familial or romantic tie or friendship” file jointly, no official legal status required  
BB: A lot of laws are written more sensibly there.  
YL: neat  
YL: it’s nice to know that you don’t just want to marry me for tax purposes  
YL: <3  
BB: <3  
rosaceousReaper answered memo  
RR: how do you not know how to do taxes Weiss?  
RR: youre like the queen of boring rules and stuff  
WS: I used to have an accountant.  
WS: Why would I have bothered to learn?  
RR: for when you ditched your awful dad and struck out on your own as part of an awesome team of independent huntresses, duh  
WS: It’s not like I knew how my life was going to go, you know.  
WS: And anyway, do you know how to do yours?  
RR: no but i have an excuse  
RR: because i skipped to beacon before i took the class at signal  
RR: and beacon was attacked by a dragon before i learned it there and then i was pretty busy for a while  
RR: good thing no one cares about all the taxes we didnt pay on our freelance stuff when we were crossing anima  
lotusRising answered memo  
LR: Actually, I made sure to keep up on those.  
nonsenseVictorious answered memo  
NV: wait  
NV: you actually paid the taxes on that?  
LR: Yes.  
NV: whatd you do that for?  
NV: we were in the middle of nowhere we would have totally gotten away with skipping them  
LR: It’s the appropriate thing to do.  
NV: aw come on fight the power  
protectiveNike answered memo  
PN: Weiss, Ruby, I’d be happy to help you with your taxes.  
PN: I’m fairly familiar with all of Mistral’s procedures.  
PN: We’ll get Jaune, too, and make an afternoon of it.  
RR: yeah, tax party!  
RR: wait, that sounds horrible actually  
RR: but it’s with friends so it’ll be good  
WS: Quite. Thank you, Pyrrha.  
WS: I’m free tomorrow if you are.  
RR: me too  
jejuneAdmirer answered memo  
JA: that does sound good, though i’m not sure if i’m paying taxes this year yet  
WS: Really? You’ve gone on plenty of hunts lately.  
WS: I’d have thought for sure that you were above Mistral’s minimum income levels.  
JA: yeah, but mistral’s government has really made some questionable steps lately when it comes to their rebuilding programs  
NV: no kidding!  
JA: i’m not sure they deserve it  
WS: Oh, I’m sure that will go over great with the tax people.  
YL: yeah I don’t think saying you don’t feel like paying puts you on the tax exempt list Jaune  
YL: sorry  
JA: taxes are mandatory?  
WS: What.  
YL: huh?  
BB: Did  
BB: Did you not know that?  
JA: i thought they were a voluntary thing  
WS: You’ve got to be kidding me.  
yearningLionheart took a screenshot!  
YL: saving that for posterity  
YL: Jaune Arc, elite warrior, legendary huntsman, hero of remnant  
YL: doesn’t know how taxes work  
JA: lots of people didn’t pay them back home!  
JA: i thought it was just something you did if you were feeling charitable or you thought the government was doing a good job  
NV: thats how it ought to work!  
LR: But that isn’t how it works.  
PN: To be fair, there is actually a tradition in Mistral of refusing to pay taxes as a form of civil disobedience.  
YL: you don’t have to indulge your boyfriend just because you think he’s cute  
PN: I don’t!  
PN: The indulgence thing, I mean.  
PN: He is pretty cute.  
PN: :)  
JA: :)  
RR: get a room!  
yearningLionheart uploaded file pyrrhaisamorosexual.jpg  
BB: Yang, the text in that screenshot is still up in the chat window.  
YL: yeah but I wanted to emphasize the point  
RR: hey tax evasion can be cool  
RR: uncle Qrow says he never paid any taxes on huntsman stuff until he became a teacher  
ordainedPeasant answered memo  
OP: Ozpin says to tell you that he actually took care of Qrow’s taxes for him the whole time.  
RR: oh  
OP: Also, if any of you want to avoid paying taxes, I can give you some tips.  
OP: My aunt taught me some loopholes in the system.  
OP: I’ve always managed to get it so I don’t actually owe anything.  
JA: that sounds good  
JA: what tips do you have?  
OP: Well, have you been keeping track of any birthday presents and stuff you’ve been sending your family members?  
OP: You’re a huntsman, so you can deduct that as supporting dependents.  
OP: You know what, I’ve got it all written down somewhere, this’ll be easier.  
ordainedPeasant uploaded file taxtipsandtricks.pdf  
LR: Mistral lets you deduct money you're saving up for intended future weapons purchases?  
OP: Up to 500 lien a year, yeah.  
OP: They check the savings account that you list every couple of years to make sure you’re not just hoarding it but you can get around that by just having two accounts and transferring the money every so often.  
LR: I see.  
OP: And of course Mistrali law doesn’t let the revenue service go after anyone for any errors in filing that add up to less than 100 lien, so you can take advantage of that if you’re careful.  
OP: Plus hunters get all sorts of extra breaks and deductions.  
RR: okay new plan for tax party  
RR: we all buy Oscar some snacks and a new jacket or whatever and stand around yelling encouragement while he does our taxes for us so we don’t have to pay anything  
BB: That seems a bit like we’d be taking advantage of him, don’t you think?  
OP: Hey, as long as the snacks are good it works for me.  
BB: Oh, well then that’s fine.  
NV: yeah tax fraud!  
OP: It’s not fraud, Nora.  
OP: Everything I do with them is perfectly legal.  
OP: Technically.  
JA: technically legal is the best kind of legal  
WS: Agreed.  
WS: Thanks for the help.  
WS: I’ll see you all tomorrow, then?  
RR: yep  
OP: Sure.  
JA: sounds good  
PN: See you then!  
wintrySiren closed memo.


End file.
